FFXV: Demon Jizz & Dimensional Pockets

[amichan]

I was too hot and now too cold and now too hot again but I’m not going to make the mistake of throwing the covers off because I’ll be too cold, stupid body tricks. I hear a cough by the door and [Prompto] is there.

“Hey,” he says, “Glad is snoring like crazy in there, can I come in here?” we both know he’s full of shit but I appreciate it, “I’ll sleep on a chair or something or curl up at the bottom of your bed like a dog,” he gives that shit eating grin, “unless you’re going to freak out and stab me in your sleep.”

“If I was going to do that I could do that even if you were in the chair.”

“Good point,” he says, scratching the back of his head.

“I’m not exactly sleeping right now anyway.”

“Ah,” he moves the chair over from by the desk to by the far side of the bed and sits down, putting his bare feet up on the bed, “Well, I guess I wouldn’t either getting covered in demon dick.”

“Really?”

“What?” he shakes his head, “I mean it was everywhere, and then all the stuff after.”

I just give him a look, but it’s getting hard to form thoughts properly my ears are ringing a bit louder.

“What?” he says, again.

“I thought you were thinking about Cindy,” I muster, “and really you were thinking about demon dick.”

“Hey I never said anything about demon dick. I just said you were the one who got demon jizz all over you.”

Ah, ringing ears you betrayed me not that it’s any less funny. I can’t help but wonder if Ignis overheard our conversation right now, “Oh, my mistake.”

“Yes, your—hey, I didn’t think I was saying anything that bad. No need to cover your ears.”

“No, it’s not actually you—unless you’re making my ears ring.”

“Man, if I could do that to people...” he puts his hand under his chin, leaning back over-emphasizing thinking about the possibilities but just for a moment, “Anything I can get you for that though?”

“I really don’t know,” I try changing position but that pulls on my chest, so I lay back down on my side facing him again.

“Yeah,” he says, “I guess it’s tricky with everything that was going on. I mean, seriously, Iggy’s hands were like in your chest, and I mean, I didn’t think hands could go that far into somebody’s chest I could have sworn they would have been into the bed...” he shudders while shaking his head.

“And you didn’t pass out? I’m impressed.”

He pulls a face at me, “Come on, Noct. Give me more credit.”

I give him a look.

“I didn’t,” There’s a pause, “We’re not going to talk about how I almost threw up.”

“Almost?”

“I didn’t puke, okay?”

“Okay,” I put one hand up assuring him it’s done.

“It helps that Iris was there,” he says, ruefully, “I’m shallow.”

“Yeah. I know. Can’t look bad in front of the ladies.”

“Seriously though,” he’s so genuinely confused, “I don’t...his arm--”

“I don’t want to talk about,” I put my hand to my chest before I realize I’m doing it, but it’s aching now that I’ve thought about it too much, “my dimensional...it’ll be fine by morning...”

“Once the demon jizz is out of your system.”

“There you go again with the demon jizz. I think you have a problem.”

He laughs, “I have many problems. We know this.”

“Yeah. You came along on this trip.”

“Can’t let you have all the fun,” he leans back again, but the chair starts to slip. He manages to regain footing though with much relief on everyone’s parts, “Loud noises from the prince’s room!” he declares dramatically, “Two guardians come rushing in and find me sprawled out.”

“That would only be bad if you had fallen on to me. You fallen on your back or ass, that’s normal.”

“Harsh,” he dramatically clutches his chest with one hand, “Your words are cruel, your highness.”

I muster one of the spare pillows out and throw it at him, “Don’t start with that shit.”

He deflects the pillow away from himself and me and across the room where it thankfully just hits the floor and nothing else. No ‘loud noises’ to cause anyone running in here in case there’s an attack or I’ve done something stupid like summon a sword in my sleep and sliced something in half. So glad I’ve never really had nightmares at least since I got these things...installed? That’s definitely the wrong word. I’m not a car.

“Iris is something else though,” [Prompto] continues.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, she didn’t seem too phased—I mean she freaked out at first but...”

“Well, that’s—I remember that, mostly...” us coming back to the hotel topped up on enough things so that I could get from the car to the building and up to the room, [Prompto] sent on ahead, and me with Glad and Iggy without it looking like anything was too wrong, and then inside for everything to be hopefully sorted.

Iris had been gathering things based on what she’d been told and managed to get it on the table nearby without dropping anything but she was shaky. I vaguely remember things clattering but things were getting foggier.

“She’s sort of seen this before—well, recovering,” I point out, “but it was. There weren’t demons involved, just me learning how to phase and things. It’s not easy.”

He snorts, “Regular training with Glad was bad enough I can’t imagine…”

“Yeah, more problems than a broken leg.”

“That’s for sure,” he shakes his head, “There are times I wish I could do that cool stuff, and then shit like this happens.”

I can’t help but laugh, “It’s not all high flying excitement.”

He just gives me a look, “You act like I didn’t know this already. I’m not a total plebe.”

“So, what’s the rest of you?”

“Ha-ha.”

“No, seriously,” I turn slightly onto my side.

“Well, at least I’m not mostly asshole,” he says with a grin.